Well, lost a friend today.
Basically, it went like this:
You know how you’re so dramatic that it’s exhausting to be around you? Well, I haven’t actually been busy for the last several weeks, I would just rather be alone than around you, so I lied and said I had other plans.
Um… First off… Ouch. Just having the thought is painful enough. The idea that it’s better or kinder to lie than to just be honest about it doesn’t work. I mean, sure you’d sound like a jerk, but you’d just be voicing what you really feel. I think a real friend would be like: I could use some down time. Or, I don’t feel like hanging out.
Christians don’t get to lie to one another.
Do not lie to one another, seeing that you have put off the old self with its practices and have put on the new self which is being renewed in knowledge after the image of its creator.
Therefore having put away falsehood let each one of you speak the truth with his neighbor for we are members one of another.
I don’t think that Christians are super-allowed to give up one each other, either.
Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.
Bear with one another and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.
So… even now I don’t get to write my friend off… but God doesn’t forgive us unrepentant, still sinning. Hence little warnings. But I’m gob-smacked. There isn’t a lot on my end that I can do. It’s not really acceptable behavior to lie to a fellow Christian, much less lying to shun or avoid them. I can’t squeeze that into “Love your neighbor as yourself.”
But I can squeeze myself into that. My purported brother in Christ has said that life is better off without me, that he’s happier that way. Add onto that the idea that unrepentant sin is an attack on relationships.
But basically I’m just calling it for now. With repentance and love, all things are possible. But lying, sneaking, and hating like that are deal-breakers. It grieves me to acknowledge what is increasingly clear. There’s no friendship here.